A little light entertainment for you:
Going to war over religion is basically killing each other to see who's got the better imaginary friend. Richard Jeni
I went to a restaurant the other day called "Taste of the Raj". The waiter hit me with a stick and got me to build a complicated railway system. Harry HillOkay, two more:
My wife gets so jealous. She came home from work and was mad at me because there was a pretty girl on the bus she thought I would have liked. Ray Romano
I saw six men kicking and punching my mother-in-law. My wife said "Aren't you going to help?".Goodnight.
I said, "No, Six should be enough." Les Dawson